Wednesday, May 29, 2013

al-Qaida Office Politics

From the Associated Press:
AP Exclusive: Rise of al-Qaida Sahara terrorist
DAKAR, Senegal (AP) — After years of trying to discipline him, the leaders of al-Qaida's North African branch sent one final letter to their most difficult employee. In page after scathing page, they described how he didn't answer his phone when they called, failed to turn in his expense reports, ignored meetings and refused time and again to carry out orders.

Most of all, they claimed he had failed to carry out a single spectacular operation, despite the resources at his disposal.

The employee, international terrorist Moktar Belmoktar, responded the way talented employees with bruised egos have in corporations the world over: He quit and formed his own competing group. And within months, he carried out two lethal operations that killed 101 people in all: one of the largest hostage-takings in history at a BP-operated gas plant in Algeria in January, and simultaneous bombings at a military base and a French uranium mine in Niger just last week....MORE
HT: Reason's Hit&Run blog.
We joke but underneath the yuks is a simple fact, the only way to deal with these guys is to kill them.
See also:
"Dealing with Pirates (and terrorists) Russian Style"
"We Must Study Porn to Defeat Al Qaeda" (PORN)
Al-Qaeda Questions Legality of Anwar al-Awlaki Killing
Al-Qaida on U.S. Media: "Fox News 'lacks neutrality'; MSNBC 'Good' Until it Fired Keith Olbermann"
New threat to travellers from al-Qaeda 'keister bomb'
Media: "Al Qaeda issues English-language advice magazine for militants"
It appears the various Al Queda franchises are putting together a stable of media properties à la Murdoch or Sulzberger:
Media: "Al-Qaeda has launched a women's magazine that mixes beauty and fashion tips with advice on suicide bombings"

Media Critique: "Is al Qaeda's new English-language magazine any good?"
"The Economics of Al-Qaeda in Iraq"
Position Available: CFO
Got a thirst for adventure, an unquenchable religious fervor, and a willingness to trade in the corner office for a cave?
Then al-Qaida has the job for you!

Following a U.S. drone strike in Pakistan, the media
is reporting the death of Mustafa Abu al-Yazid, also known as Sheik Saeed al-Masri. As a founding member of al-Qaida and third-in-command behind Osama bin Laden and Ayman al-Zawahiri, Masri was characterized variously as the organization's chief financial officer and its chief operations officer.

So what does a terrorist CFO actually do?
In other al-Qaida news, Google translate gives us this story from today's Moskovsky Komsomolec: 
"A former bodyguard of Osama told that bin Laden blew himself to avoid capture"