Friday, March 17, 2017

Okay, I Bought Into the Hiding From Facial Recognition Cameras, I Can Even See Dropping Big Money On Security Features But This, This Is Nuts

I've mentioned the hassle of applying the anti-camera tech just so you can cross the lobby to get a sandwich:

And you know the trend toward bunkers and other hidy-holes? We started that:
 note tie on gentleman

and I meant to post on the $17.5 million "most secure house in the world" with security features we can't even tell you about but forgot (see after the jump).

However, here's where I draw the line:

From Geekologie:

Hushme, A Bane-Style Mouth Cover That Masks Your Speech
This is a promotional video for the Hushme, a ridiculous looking piece of technology that muffles and masks your voice while you're on the phone so your coworkers can't hear you talk about how much you hate all your coworkers. Me? I let them know loud and proud. Hey Phil-- "Eat shit and die, I know, I know." You got it buddy!
Hushme is a personal acoustic device that protects speech privacy in open space environments."
the Hushme website claims the device includes customized voice-masking sounds like a monkey screeching, Darth Vader breathing, and a Minion laughing.
Other muffling options include the sound of the ocean, wind, rain, birds, squirrels, and R2-D2.

Although I think the monkeys screeching and Minion laugh stand the best chance of driving a coworker to attempted murder. And that's what this is all about, right -- paid short-term disability leave for a work stabbing? PROTIP: Wear chain-mail covered in ketchup packets under your work shirt.
Thanks to Valerie, who agrees the best means of privacy over the phone is talking entirely in code. Copy that, red 41 banana flippers, over.
And from Curbed, August 31, 2016:

For $17.5M, this WTF-worthy Atlanta home is billed as ‘world’s safest’
The listing would provide the address, but then it would have to kill you
Atlanta’s most paranoid high-rollers and sheiks have probably caught wind of this new $17.5-million listing, which is alternately billed as a "modern fortress," "presidential compound," and "one of the world’s safest homes."

With eight bedrooms, 12 bathrooms, and 36,000 square feet, this North Atlanta Fort Knox is chockfull of Scarface-grade security and extravagance befitting Bruce Wayne.

The weirdly secretive listing photos show glimpses of architectural flourishes like archways and Ionic columns, doors with innumerable locks, geese, art gallery patrons, bowling balls, a shooting range, and what looks like still shots from the movie Predator. WTF moments abound.

Technically speaking, this place is SAFE — a Strategically Armored and Fortified Environment, designed by global security expert Al Corbi, per the listing. Hardly believable features include a secret 30-car vault, full water and power supplies, and three kitchens that include catering....MORE
Do check out the listing
That large cupola appearing object on the roof is, I believe, the panic room which would make me a bit nervous in light of Edmond Safra's death in his panic room:

A terrible tragedy: Mr Safra succumbed to smoke in the building's highly reinforced panic room. The room was meant to protect him, but it ended up being his tomb
Mr. Safra's Belle Epoque Monaco Penthouse was flipped by the Candy Bros. for an amount variously reported as $305-$323 Million.
From our possibly relevant post "Worst-Case Wednesday: How to Jump From Rooftop to Rooftop To Make Your Escape".

But seriously, the voice muffler is a bit much. You'll be as discrete as this guy when you make your entrance: