Wednesday, March 5, 2008

Help Wanted: Trader/Blogger

Looking at the pictures in the post below I realized I'm tired of winter.
The lady attorneys are talking about how the spring fling in the Bahamas might not compare to the St. Tropez Regatta and I'm humming Southern Cross*
(and "I like big Butts"; help).

The ideal candidate will be 28 with twenty plus years at the market.

I.Q.-
- Blogging: 80 seems to be the cutoff.
-Trading: a buck-fifty will still find ways to lose money but the rationalizations will be pure poetry (see below).

Field ecology or equiv.
(counting bugs in a square meter, not "Ain't Knut cute")
Structured finance experience and a bored superiority required.
Nobel Laureates need not apply (see: LTCM)

Conversant with state-of-the-art quant theory
(for when the Thursday evening party starts dragging)

Interest in just about everything a plus.
(BIG bonus credit if you can make Marxist polemic exciting)

Salary: negligible.
Bonus: see essay question.

Essay question: Can you trade your way out of a paper bag? Explain.

Use of French, German or Mandarin at inappropriate moments okey-dokey.
(exception: use of "jejune" or "poseur", which will terminate the interview and possibly the interviewee)

Writing ability: Booker Award or equiv. and 500 words explaining why the first line of Blake's "Augeries of Innocence" is superior/inferior to Betjeman's "A Subaltern's Love Song".

Marketing: Design, plan and implement

Brit Poetry Smackdown 2008.
Blake vs. Betjeman

To see a world in a grain of sand
And a heaven in a wild flower,
Hold infinity in the palm of your hand
And eternity in an hour.

vs.
Miss J. Hunter Dunn, Miss J. Hunter Dunn,
Furnish'd and burnish'd by Aldershot sun,

Email query letters to climateer@gmail.com, attach two good jokes.

*(Live version)
*How can you beat a (trading) coda like this:

...So we cheated and we tried and we tested
And we never failed to fail, it was the easiest thing to do
You will survive being bested
Somebody strong comes along, makes me forget,
forget about loving you
And the southern cross