Silicon Valley tends to bristle at how it’s depicted in movies and TV shows, often with very good reason. Despite many strong qualities, “The Social Network” received a ton of criticism over accuracy from the people who really lived it. And of course there was Bravo’s disastrous reality show, “Start-Ups,” which was soundly rejected by audiences, critics, and entrepreneurs alike.
So when yesterday’s headlines about HBO’s new series “Silicon Valley” referred to it as “‘Entourage’ for the startup scene,” many in the Valley naturally wanted to remove their eyeballs and light them on fire. “Entourage” wasn’t a terrible show, at least not at first before it began to take itself too seriously. But it quickly ran out of things to say about its four photogenic stars, whose personal goals rarely strayed from grabbing as much cash, fame, and sex as possible (yes, yes, I know it’s about “male friendship” too, but those themes usually only arose when the quest for all that other stuff failed).
...
OPENING CREDITS
A limo speeds down the Golden Gate Bridge as a new Buckcherry song written specifically for the show blares. Our hero, Dashiell Champ, emerges from the sun roof of the limo with his very best buds: close friend Todd “T” O’O'Donnelly, Dashiell’s brother Chad-Brad “Tad” Champ, and eternal hanger-on “Skunk Troll.” Lots of champagne splashing about, strippers, all that “Entourage” stuff, etc.
INT. THE SPRAWLING MARKET ST. OFFICE OF SHAREABLES, WHICH IS LIKE AIRBNB BUT FOR WEARABLES. IT’S THE WORST.
T is furiously tapping on a computer. Dashiell enters with the bluster befitting a CEO whose company was just valued at $2 billion.
DASHIELLWhat it do, what it do? How’s my favorite C “T” O doing? [laughs]TAbout to be on the other side of a 12-hour marathon coding session on my Lenovo N308 laptop with quad-core Tegra processor. All this coding is really hard work! But you gotta do a lot of coding when you’re a startup, you know?DASHIELLBro, I feel you. Are you ready for the big party tonight?TEhhhhhh I’ve been giving that some thought. I don’t know if it’s such a good idea to throw a big crazy party at this stage of our company. We still have no revenue, we don’t have a plan for how we’re going to get revenue…DASHIELLMy man, don’t get all nervous on me now, I got it under control. Remember back home how everything always turned out okay for us no matter what happened, because we were white males growing up in suburbia? It’s just like that. Plus I got some booth babes for the event. I know you like booth babes!TEhhhhh….. yeaahhhhhhhhhDASHIELLThat’s what’s up!Dashiell and T high-five for a while
...
Kinda makes you want to run right back across the bridge to the squalor of Marin:
