Today In Cheese News: "his love of Stilton cheese' ultimately led to his downfall"

These people are not criminal masterminds.

If they were criminal masterminds they would be lawyers and bankers and hedge fund managers.
And politicians

From the BBC, May 24:

Cheese photo leads to Liverpool drug dealer's downfall
A drug dealer was tracked down after sharing a photo of Stilton cheese.

Carl Stewart, 39, was identified through his fingerprints after police analysed the image he posted in an online chat.

He was jailed for 13 years and six months after admitting conspiracy to supply heroin, cocaine, ketamine and MDMA at Liverpool Crown Court.

The dealer, of Gem Street, Liverpool, was also sentenced for transferring criminal property.

Stewart posted the photo on the encrypted messaging service EncroChat, which had been cracked by police....

....MORE

And as noted in a 2017 post "Sweet Dreams Are Made Of Cheese": 

Who am I to dis a brie?

From the British Cheese Board via the Wayback Machine:

Sunday, 25 September 2005

Sweet Dreams Are Made Of Cheese

The age old myth that cheese gives you nightmares has finally been laid to rest this week following the release of a new study carried out by the British Cheese Board.

The in-depth Cheese & Dreams study, a first of its kind, reveals that eating cheese before bed will not only aid a good night’s sleep but different cheeses will in fact cause different types of dreams.

Of the 200 volunteers who participated in the week-long study, 72% slept well every night, 67% remembered their dreams and none recorded experiencing nightmares after eating a 20g piece of cheese half an hour before going to sleep.

A lot of people still believe the old wives tale that cheese gives you nightmares but this study endorses the scientific facts.

“ One of the amino acids in cheese – tryptophan – has been shown to reduce stress and induce sleep so cheese may actually help you have a good night’s sleep,” says Dr Judith Bryans, Nutrition Scientist at The Dairy Council.

85% of females who ate Stilton had some of the most unusual dreams of the whole study. 65% of people eating Cheddar dreamt about celebrities, over 65% of participants eating Red Leicester revisited their schooldays, all female participants who ate British Brie had nice relaxing dreams whereas male participants had cryptic dreams, two thirds of all those who ate Lancashire had a dream about work and over half of Cheshire eaters had a dreamless sleep.

Commenting on the study, Neil Stanley, PhD Director of Sleep Research HPRU Medical Research Centre at the University of Surrey says: "The Cheese and Dreams study conducted by the British Cheese Board is the first study of its kind and suggests that eating cheese before you go to bed may actually aid a good night’s sleep....MORE

...British Brie caused all participants to sleep very well, but dreams varied between males and females; women tended to experience very nice dreams, such as Jamie Oliver cooking dinner in their kitchens, or relaxing on a sunny beach. By contrast, the men who ate Brie experienced rather odd, obscure dreams, such as driving against a battleship, or having a drunken conversation with a dog....  

HT: Freakonomics

Just so we're clear, the intro line is not mine, it goes back, at minimum, to the late '80's/early '90's. Maybe as early as the day after the song dropped.

The correct attribution would be "-anon."

Here are some continuation lyrics and again, I can't stress this enough, not by me:

Sweet dreams are made of cheese
Who am I to dis a Brie
I cheddar the world and a Feta cheese
Everybody's looking for Stilton
 

Some cheese wants to be Bleu, too
Some cheese wants to be Buchette d'Anjou
Some cheese wants to be cubed
Some cheese will be braided by you

Sweet dreams are made of cheese
Colby or Chevre, if you please
I ferment the milk and then I squeeze
Everybody needs penicillium

Mold is better, on the rind
Mold is better, leaves taste behind
Mold is better, cheese is confined
Mold is better, use my enzymes...

...MORE at amIright's parody page