Monday, May 14, 2018

Dammit! DFJ's Tim Draper Is NOT Batshit Crazy!

He only sounds like that when he speaks.

From FT Alphaville, May 11:

Draper, Fisher, mistaken
Sandy Cohen lookalike Tim Draper, a founder of elite venture capital fund Draper Fisher Jurveston (DFJ), took to CNBC yesterday wearing a Bitcoin tie, to defend Silicon Valley against the encroachments of the big, bad government.
His opinions include the idea that holding “total hero” Mark Zuckerberg accountable in front of congress for Facebook's data leaks sends a “very bad message to all of our youth”. Then there was his defense of Theranos, who the Securities and Exchange Commission recently charged with, in the SEC's words, “massive fraud”.
DFJ were the first investors in Theranos, ponying up $500k in 2004 to then 19 year old founder Elizabeth Holmes, so she could begin to realise her vision of creating an all-in-one blood test to detect a range of diseases.
Come 2015, and Theranos was sporting a $9bn dollar valuation, having raised $700m from investors such as Oracle chief executive Larry Ellison and Rupert Murdoch to disrupt medical technology. Unfortunately, it turns out that Ms Holmes was full of hot air. From the SEC complaint:
Theranos raised more than $700 million from late 2013 to 2015 while deceiving investors by making it appear as if Theranos had successfully developed a commercially-ready portable blood analyzer that could perform a full range of laboratory tests from a small sample of blood. They deceived investors by, among other things, making false and misleading statements to the media, hosting misleading technology demonstrations, and overstating the extent of Theranos’ relationships with commercial partners and government entities, to whom they had also made misrepresentations. 
Theranos and Ms Holmes settled the case, with Ms Holmes agreeing to return millions of shares to the company, pay a $500k fine and not serve as an officer or director of a public company for 10 years.

Given the above, and reports that Theranos is in the process of winding down, some might expect Mr Draper to show humility. Perhaps even apologise to the Wall Street Journal's John Carreyrou, who expertly covered Theranos' downfall over the past few years, and who Mr Draper, along with his family, has relentlessly criticised.
He went... in a different direction....MUCH MORE
July 2016
Theranos Is Flopping Like A Dying Fish
Sometimes they flop themselves right back into the water, but that's not the way to bet....
...World’s Most Loyal V.C. Says Theranos Critics Are Just Haters
Tim Draper goes to bat for Elizabeth Holmes.
And previously on Mr. Draper:

July 2014 
Silicon Valley: Venture Capitalist Tim Draper Has a Cringworthy YouTube Channel

December 2013
Venture Capitalist Tim Draper Wants To Split California Into Pieces And Turn Silicon Valley Into Its Own State

September 2014
UPDATE: California Will NOT Be Splitting Into Six Separate States

April 2015
Guy Who Wanted To Split California In Six Pieces Launches Contest To Keep It Together

September 2012
Climateer Line of the Day: Mammary Edition
...Detroit has “lived off this automotive tit long enough.”
-Draper, Fisher, Jurvetson's Tim Draper
as quoted by Forbes' Eric Savitz in
November 2017
...Meanwhile, last week the D-man was saying:
Tim Draper On Bitcoin: 'In 5 Years If You Use Fiat Currency, They Will Laugh At You'
I'm starting to think the entire state of California has gone nuts.  

Seriously, I'm not just talking Sand Hill Road, they're as detached from reality as their Hollywood brethren. Now however I'm wondering about all that space between the two as well. 

And just so you know, it was not Mr. Draper who starred in 2014's "The Silicon Valley Secessionist Clarifies His Batshit Insane Plan".
That was Andreessen Horowitz's Balaji Srinivasan.

The Silicon Valley Secessionist Clarifies His Batshit Insane Plan

Not to be confused with Sherpa's Shervin Pishevar who we met in  2016's "Silicon Valley Wants to Fund California's Secession, #Calexit":
The secessionist, Mr. Pishevar, is a co-founder and MD of Sherpa Capital who own Munchery (early, A, B, C) Airbnb (D round) Uber (D, E) and Beepi, ipsy, Shyp and Expa.
They seem to have avoided Bitly, Borkly, Barnly, Molestly, Strinkingly, Happily, Crappily, Maply, Morply, Dottly, Dootly, Godly and Angrily.
(all real startups

Unfortunately Sherpa investee Washio-the Uber for washing clothes-has already folded (see what I did there?)...

...If the federal government lost access to California’s 39-million-person tax base, it would presumably grow uncomfortable.

And California, in particular, is a dangerous state to lose. California is a top crop producer; there’s Hollywood, there’s plenty of marijuana, there’s a massive tourism industry....MORE 
Roger that, the ole "You'll miss us when we're gone" pitch, over.

Who gets the Bitly, Borklys in the divorce?
And the stoned tourists lost in Hollywood?